12 Ways to Live a Peaceful Life in New York City When Things Return to Normal

During this global pandemic of 2020 where we have all been asked to stay in quarantine, I have oddly found myself feeling more peaceful than one would expect. I have been trying to figure out why. The obvious reasons are easy to see, I have no work stress right now or the pressure of social gatherings. I am completely free to spend my time as I wish (indoors or course). I have taken hours to myself meditating, playing my music, reading, and taking online courses. It has been, in a way very fulfilling, but yet I knew there was something more to this feeling of contentment that is rare living in a city like New York. This morning, like a lightbulb going off in my head, I realized what it is.. I have zero control of what is happening right now, therefore there is nothing for me to be doing except staying home. There’s no pressuring work that must be done or errands to run. I can’t stress about the virus or the economy because it is all completely out of my control. Right away I picked up my phone and texted my cousin and a good friend excited to tell them my sudden epiphany:

“This is what I’ve found during quarantine…there is a sense of peace that comes with knowing you cannot control the situation so you just live each day in the moment, enjoying the simple pleasures in life; I am reading a book and drinking a cup of coffee and could not be happier; when control is taken away from us, we can find peace, and I just hope I can continue this feeling when the world comes back to life.”

These were my exact words and it was like I had suddenly found the answer to a very big question. This is the feeling every yogi and mediation expert and even my therapist has been trying to get me to feel for so many years. This is EXACTLY what I have been looking for in life. I have always been a bit of a control freak and a perfectionist which has caused some anxiety in my life. I always think, “how many things can I accomplish today?” “How much can I achieve this year?” It’s always about work, work, work, and striving for more. Doing more and being better than before and don’t stop trying. It can be absolutely exhausting to live this way, but when we are required to pause our lives, stay home and well…do nothing, suddenly all that control melts away, and the feeling that remains is like a calm surrender. We all know eventually this is all going to pass. Life will return back to the normal craziness as the city comes back to life. Yes, it will take time, but we all know time passes way too quickly, and we will be back to that craziness before we realize it. There will hopefully be a vaccine, and people will fill the streets once again. We will have a million things to do and a million places to be but I am hoping that this time in solitude has taught us that when we can find time to stay still, we truly can be happier.

Here are my 10 tips to finding peace while living in New York City (or any city) when life returns to normal.

1. Create a routine and stick with it.

Working and living in NYC, there are constant happy hour drink invitations, and work days that never seem to end. During these times our bodies get thrown off balance and this can greatly affect our mood. Routine is important in combatting this unbalanced mental state, and yet routine is so hard to find in a place like New York City. You may need to give up some happy hours to create the routine that works for you. Try and wake up and go to sleep at the same time every day to balance your circadian rhythm, even on the weekends. Try and get enough sleep, and keep it consistent. Sleep is a huge contributor to a peaceful mental state and improved sleep quality will make you feel more refreshed and ready to conquer whatever life throws at you.

2. Build a morning ritual.

Mornings can be the most relaxing or most stressful part of your day. The choice is yours. Your morning ritual sets the tone for the rest of your day, so why would anyone want anything other than a calm morning. One of the reasons I have enjoyed quarantine is because I have plenty of time for my morning ritual, but during normal life, I like to set my alarm for 2 hours before I need to be out the door for work to ensure I am not rushing. My morning ritual looks something like this: I make myself a cup of tea, write in my gratitude journal, meditate for 10 minutes and take a little time to write. Then, I leisurely start getting ready for work. Some days may vary a bit, but for the most part I keep this consistent routine every day during the week. When I allow myself to sleep late and then I am rushing to get out the door, it sets my day up all wrong. Good news, is if you are still getting used to a morning ritual and don’t seem to have it right quite yet, there’s always tomorrow to try again.

3. Limit your nights out to no more than 2 nights a week.

This is hard to do in a place like New York. It is so tempting, and easy to jump on the happy hour bandwagon. New York City can be exciting and that excitement leads to a very active after work social life, but we all know that happy hour drinks turn into dinner, which turns into after dinner drinks and a later night than planned. While these nights can be fun, and a big part of experiencing life in NYC, they can also be the reason we are often thrown off our routine. Try and limit going out to 2 nights at most during the week. Enjoy happy hour drinks, but if it does roll into dinner, forgo the after dinner cocktail so you can head home and get at least a decent night sleep. Avoid drinking alcohol 4 hours before bedtime to ensure an uninterrupted night sleep.

4. Send your laundry out and order food in.

One of the things we lack most by living in a place like New York is time. We work very long hours and when we aren’t working we are trying to catch up on the simple things in life like running errands or finding any time for a haircut. For this very reason, New York has adopted a culture of convenience. You can literally order anything to be delivered. You can have your laundry picked up and dropped off when it’s nicely cleaned and folded,avoiding hours waiting at a laundry mat. Grocery shopping is another stressful, time-consuming activity in New York. Companies like Fresh Direct, Blue Apron, Hello Fresh and Whole Foods allow you to order your groceries avoiding the craziness of the supermarket. You can even get your wine delivered straight to your door. Take advantages of these conveniences in NYC and save precious hours for things you actually want to be doing with your time.

5. Don’t start your morning on a crowded subway car. “Ladies and Gentlemen there is a car directly behind this one”.

I do not understood why people insist on cramming themselves onto a packed subway car. It’s possible New Yorkers have all been traumatized with the unexpected delay of the subway system at the most inopportune times, and we know that at any moment the train could, and often does just stop running. I’ll admit, I used to pack myself onto the subway as well, until I realized this was ruining my mood for the entire morning. What a miserable way to start the day. Now, I refuse to get on an over crowded subway car. How you start your day greatly determines your mindset for that day. If part of your morning routine includes meditation (as I highly recommend it does), then you will want to maintain that peaceful bliss all the way to the office. Right now, no one is taking the subway, but soon enough they will be packed once again. Do yourself a favor and wait for the next car, most likely it really is right behind this one, and if you’re a few minutes late to work it’s ok, your boss gets it, they also live in NYC, and it will not be the end of your job. If you really can’t be late, leave the house early and give yourself plenty of time to wait for that next train. Sometimes you may be waiting for a few cars to pass, but it’s worth it and really only takes an extra 10 minutes out of your day.

6. Leave the house 30 minutes early to avoid heavy rush hour.

Why is it that when we say we are going to leave the house early it never happens? On the rare occasions that it actually does it makes such a difference. From my experience the subways are the most crowded between 8-8:30am. For this reason, leaving just 30 minutes early, can make all the difference in the world regarding your hectic morning commute. Try setting your alarm 30 minutes early so you have plenty of time to get ready and practice your morning routine. Also, set an alarm 30 minutes before you are meant to leave the house so you are aware of how much time you have left to get ready. It is amazing how 30 minutes will change the quality of your commute starting the day off on the right foot.

7. While walking to work take in the sights of New York City.

If you ever stop to look around at all the people rushing to work in the morning in New York City you will notice they all look absolutely miserable. I mean, commuting to work on the subway, MetroNorth or Long Island Railroad can certainly do that to a person. We all walk along with the masses, being shuffled like cattle. When things get back to normal, stop and take a look and you will see exactly what I mean (hopefully COVID-19 has changed this). When I first moved here I loved that “energy”. Everyone had somewhere to go and they needed to be there yesterday. That’s the culture of New York City, but that doesn’t mean you have to live that way too, especially if you want to live a peaceful life. Take time to look around, stroll through a park if that’s an option on your way to work, and even take 10 minutes to sit on a bench and take a few deep breaths. Perhaps leave home a little earlier than normal and get off the subway one stop before your normal stop to walk the rest of the way to work. Finding a leisurely way to start your day will allow you to be able to better deal with challenges that are sure to arise throughout your day. Also, I’m sure how many people actually realizes how amazing the sun rising over Time Square on a beautiful spring morning is. I haven’t seen this in 6 weeks now. Surely when life returns to normal we will all start noticing these small amazing details in our amazing city.

8. Take advantage of all the free or low cost opportunities the city has to offer.

New York is one of the most expensive cities in the world, but the cool thing is it is also a great city for experiences that don’t break the bank. There are loads of things to do in NYC without spending a ton of money. Most museums in New York are suggested donation, which means if you can only afford to give $5 that day, that’s ok, you are still welcome inside. There are also amazing free activities, like simply strolling through the New York Public Library, having a picnic in Central Park, riding the Staten Island Ferry for free and seeing the amazing views of the Statue of Liberty. Playing the lottery for inexpensive Broadway tickets is a great way to see world class productions. New York does an amazing job of helping it’s residents experience everything it has to offer at minimal cost, so take advantage of it. By not spending a lot of money you will feel even happier and more at peace with yourself and your wallet.

9.Open a bottle of wine and cook a meal one night a week at home while listening to your favorite music.

New Yorkers do not utilize their apartments enough because they are usually the size of closets with kitchens barely big enough to cook spaghetti. The majority of our time is spent commuting to work, AT work, or out for drinks after work. This is the reason most New Yorkers are fine with living in tiny shoebox apartments, because we are never home (COVID days aside). I’ve noticed that regardless of the apartment size I have lived in over the years, on the rare occasions that I stay in, turn on music, open a bottle of wine, and cook dinner it’s so peaceful. In a way it’s even more of a treat than going out to eat because it rarely happens. Combine that with reading a book or watching a good movie and you have the makings of an amazingly peaceful evening. Also, you’ll be putting that expensive apartment to good use!

10.Treat yourself to brunch or dinner solo twice a month.

Some of the best weekend mornings I have are when I take myself on a brunch date. I usually go to my local French café, ask for a table for one and read a book while sipping a latte and waiting for my breakfast. The servers are always so lovely and welcoming and they don’t mind at all that I’m solo and taking up a table just for me. Find the local spot in your neighborhood. New Yorkers are very independent and often times the most peaceful meals are the ones you have dining out alone. Besides, you never know what interesting people you might strike up a conversation with.

11. Ride the east river ferry or stroll through the west village on a sunny afternoon.

Two of my favorite things to do on a sunny weekend afternoon in New York City are riding The East River Ferry and strolling through the West Village. The ferries are now even better than ever! They are spotlessly clean, the cost of concessions are market value so you will pay no more than $8 for a beer and $3 for a bag of chips and better yet, there is a restroom on board. The views of the city are phenomenal and the ride costs $3, the same as a fare on the subway. The West Village is, and has always been one of my favorite neighborhoods in Manhattan, and strolling through the West Village has always been one of my favorite things to do. There is just something about those cobblestone streets and beautiful brownstones that make me feel I am living in a movie, and remind me how amazing New York really is. I love popping into a favorite local spot like “The Spotted Pig”, or “Fish” for an impromptu cocktail and oysters. These days the streets of the West Village are much more crowded than they used to be, but I still love just strolling and seeing where my day takes me.

12.Go for coffee and skip the cocktails

I LOVE Europe, and one of the reasons why is that Europe has an amazing coffee culture and here in New York, it seems that everything revolves around alcohol. The leisurely coffee culture in Europe where one can spend hours sipping on a cappuccino and catching up with friends is one of the most relaxing ways to spend your afternoon. While these coffee places are rare even in New York, they do still exist. The neighborhood of Astoria, Queens is home to many spacious Greek café’s and the servers there will certainly not mind you spending the afternoon with them. In the warmer weather the outdoor seating is especially pleasant. Two of my favorites for this experience are “Flo” and “Avenue” on 30thAvenue and 36th/37thStreet, and “Martha’s Cafe” on Ditmars avenue. If you don’t want to make the trek to Queens, there are plenty of coffee shops in the city, just make it a point to go out for coffee more. It will lead to more quality conversation and less alcohol consumption.

Once things get back to normal in New York City and the craziness returns, which it most certainly will (it’s just a matter of time), try to incorporate these simple tips to make sure you are living the best life you can. New York is a very stressful place to live, but it doesn’t have to be. The stress and anxiety are in us, it’s not the city’s fault, and while yes it does demand more from us that any other city in America, there are still ways to enjoy the simple pleasures this wonderful city brings.